I am my mother's daughter

my heros

Today make two weeks since my mother's funeral. It was a beautiful service. People came from other states to pay their respects. I am overwhelmed by how many people she left an impression with. I have had people I don't even know send me cards and email about how she either helped them or made them laugh. I miss her badly. I am LDS and I do have a testimony of the Atonement. I know that families can be together forever and I do try to keep an eternal perspective. I know that if I live my life right I can be with her again but I also know that it is ok for me to be sad and to feel hurt. I lost my mother. My kids will never know how wonderful she was. I can't call her when I have something important to tell her, even though I still do just to hear her voice on the recording. Every time I close my eyes I see her face and the thing that scares me the most is the day that I close my eyes and don't. I do not feel sorry for myself. I know the Lord has a plan and it is not my job to ask questions I am just supposed to have faith and do my part.... but it still hurts. I do trust the Lord and I am grateful for trials, I think they are the biggest blessings an individual can have. It is through trials that we are given the greatest opportunitys to grow. My mom taught me to be strong, to hold my head up, to remember that there is nothing that I can't do, and most of all she taught me the gospel and to trust in the Lord with all my heart. I do trust the Lord, I have lost my Brother, Grandfather, Grandmother, and My Mother in a less then a year and a half...... I just wonder what else he has in store for me? What ever it is I am ready and willing. I am my mother's daughter.